After a very interesting conversation with a twenty something year old cousin, it peaked my interest to find out how women and men felt on is there is a such a time/thing as sleeping with someone "too soon". Here a few questions that we discussed and I would like to get your take on them without expressing my point of view first.
When, or is it ever, too soon to sleep with a person?
Do men view women differently or respect them less if they sleep with them after 1 date, or two or three? Why or why not?
Do women/men feel pressured to be intimate right away in fear of the other person leaving or becoming disinterested?
If the woman wants to hold true to her values and not be intimate until she is comfortably sure she has a commitment from her mate and he is monogamous with her, does that cause him to stray or stay? Why or why not?
If its the man wanting to hold off on consummating the relationship because of his morals & values and wanting to be sure his mate is monogamous and committed to him; do women view him differently or question his masculinity? Why or why not?
I don't put a timeframe on sleeping with someone. We're both grown and consenting adults. I say if you're ready why not.
ReplyDeleteAs far as a Man wanting to wait before we're intimate, I have no problem with that. I would like to hear a male's point of view on the other questions asked.
Male point of view!
ReplyDeleteArtificial time frames are an insult and remind me of High School when guys and girls should be learning how to conduct themselves in a relationship not so focused on sex. During the teen years, time lines help train men in what to expect out of a quality woman.
Once a person has reached his or her 20's they have the independence to date, explore, and define what their relationship values will be. This is typically the period where both men and women make mistakes and hopefully learn a great deal.
Each relationship or individual should be evaluated on a case by case base. I find that SOME women have made poor decisions in choosing who they give their bodies to and as they grow and mature they lose sight of the individual and apply the same standards to a genuine and honest guy that they apply to the typical dog that ruined their view of men in the first place.
There are faults on both sides but women have half the money and all the (insert slang for female sex organ)from a relationship stand point women can set the standard for the type of individual they share life's experiences with.
Honestly, I’ve never been the type of guy that has had to adhere to timelines but quite recently I might have met someone who has me between a rock and a hard place (no pun intended) and I’ve come to accept that if I want quality then I might have to make an investment in refining my approach to get long term rewards rather than short term satisfaction.
well if we are going according to the bible, god states no sex before marriage. Otherwise you are committing fornication. You can be redeemed if you repent. But if we are going by the worlds standards there is no timeframe.
ReplyDeleteahhh, kevin..they have you waiting, huh?! well..it may be worth the wait!
ReplyDelete@ Isabel what if someone else comes along with similair qualities and has more liberal views on sex and things happen naturally without any artificial time lines.... As a guy who questions whether or not waiting is the right approach... Which GOOD woman wins my long term affection?????
ReplyDelete@ Kevin you make some very valid points but as it pertains to the woman that is holding out she may chose to practice abstinence due to having a more traditional value system. Personally, I believe in waiting until I’m in a monogamous relationship and hopefully through communication with my mate we find out that we share similar beliefs and values. If you find yourself questioning a woman’s worth based on the fact that she is holding out then maybe you two aren’t on the same accord. I would more so question the true worth of the woman who is willing to give you her body so easily because I have found that anything in life worth having doesn’t come easy. I find that society as a whole is way to into instant gratification.
ReplyDeletecid, very well said!! there may various reasons why a woman may hold out & she should not be judged for that. perhaps it's b/c she wants to get to know her partner better or perhaps it's b/c she's gotten burned in the past. whatever the reason, if the guy is totally into her & stimulated by her presence rather than her body, he will wait!
ReplyDelete@ kevin, hopefully the woman who has captured your heart!! <3
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